10 Signs to Know if a Girl is Using You

November 13, 2020

Find the best way to know if a girl is using you for money, for emotional support, to get the attention of your ex, or to make someone jealous. These tips will help you be clear if she really likes you or if she is faking it.

know if a girl is using you

Knowing when a girl is using you is a slippery slope. Most people just don’t go there as they could hurt the people they care about. But sometimes when you are falling in love with a girl's head over heels and then it turns out she is only using you. That’s the moment you really wish that you would have seen it coming and maybe you did see the sign but chose to ignore it. One way or the other if you want to know if a girl is using you rather than loving you then here is your chance.

First things first, there may be something in your relationship which caused you to think that she may just be using you. You need to recognize what it is. It’s not that easy to recognize but don’t you worry we’ll guide you to do the same. It’s frustrating when you think that this could all turn out to be true and you start to feel guilty a little, but it’s not your fault that you want a healthy relationship.

At times we are just blown away with how charming, flirty and cute she is. But then whenever you meet her and try to clear things up a bit you end up more confused than ever. So if you want to clear things up once and for all and know if a girl is using you or she is genuinely interested in you then here is your chance.

Push and Pull

Are you are dating a girl who is pushing you away when she needs her space and pulls you when she feels the need? Well, I like a good dating game as much as the next guy but the push and pull on her terms, is probably taking it too far. Every girl likes to play hard to get and that’s understandable and is fun too. But then, in comes to this girl who is fun and charming at one moment and just plain mean the next.

The weird thing is this makes you fall for her even more but take caution when entering such kind of relationship. A girl who can be mean just for the fun of it is also probably dating more than one guy at a time, something to think about when you are defending this girl. When she says that she likes you like a lot and then she goes and dodge your calls text for a week or so then it’s definitely a sign that she is using you for some reason.

Friends Scam

I think you know what a friend scam is. But in case you don’t then a girl who says that you are her best friend and the time she spends with you is the best time she ever had. But as soon as you hint towards something romantics or you two even have gone to a couple of dates but now when things are getting serious she plays the friends card. The girl who in every aspect wants you to act and take care of her like a boyfriend would without the benefits of having a girlfriend just a hint for a chance at a relationship is what we call a perfect friends scam. Then it’s pretty obvious that she is using you to make her feel good about herself.

Lack of Advertisement

A girl who is in love will never back away from a chance to show off her boyfriend. But if your girl is not showing you off then either your relationship is too new to give it intimate labels or she is using you. A good example of this is when you meet her friends and they don’t even know that you existed up until a second ago. The thing is even though her friends have never met you before they would’ve heard your name as if she really liked you then she would’ve shared something about you with them. So, when you get a blank face from her friends and on top of that you are introduced as friends or without any specific label then that is definitely a sign.

Not Exclusive

This one is a no-brainer. If a girl likes you and thinks that you are the one for her then she is definitely going to introduce you as her boyfriend or as someone she is dating. But when you are introduced as a friend then as I explained before is a definite sign to know if a girl is using you. It’s time for a confrontation or at least a discussion on the matter. And if a girl even feels a little bit for you then she would at the very least think about going exclusive with you but if she is just using you then she will bow her way out of this discussion either by pretending to be confused or by crying. Sure being patient with a girl is a good thing but always remember that there are two people in this relationship and your needs matter too.


Now, this is a big possibility and every relationship goes through this phase in its own way. But if you are the guy she wants then there is no need for confusion unless you have given her a reason to doubt her feelings. Sometimes the memories of previous relationships haunt us to commit to new relationships and if that’s the case then you should tread carefully here.

It’s understandable that there would be a slight hesitation at the beginning of a new relationship but saying that she is confused after you have been dating for a month is just stringing you along. The only thing that makes sense when this happens is that she is in love with the other guy (maybe her ex) but is too afraid to get hurt and hence she is using you because you are safe and won’t hurt her. So in essence in this scenario, you are basically a scapegoat for her to feel safe and it is a good thing if you want to be her friend for life but not if you want to be with her romantically.

Empathy Seeker

Have you ever spent most of your time together consoling her and telling her or making her understand that it’s not her fault that bad things are happening in her life? If you look back now and think carefully then you’ll see the time you two spend together are mostly you comforting her about one thing or the other. Everyone needs some reassurances in their life once in a while and that’s understandable. But if this happens all the time then she may want you to help her feel good about herself and fill her life with happiness and all the riches one can afford.

I am not saying that you shouldn’t make her feel good and take care of her but at the same time, she should be doing the same for you. One way to test this is to see if she empathize with you when you need it or she just changes the topic back on her and if she does show you empathy then you know that she likes you but if not then she is using you.

Intimacy Check

Intimacy in a relationship is the best way to know if a girl is using you or she actually likes you. Guys do everything that is expected of them like taking the girl out for dinner in exquisite restaurants and give expensive gifts all in the hope of getting some love. But when a girl is using you then she will only get intimate when she needs it and will avoid intimacy otherwise. She will let you cuddle when she feels lonely but won’t let you touch her when you need it. So, if you are with a girl who only gets intimate on certain occasions and avoids you the rest of the time is definitely using you.

Her whims

Are you in a relationship in which she calls you out of the blue and you drop everything you were doing and go to her? Then I am sorry to say but you only exist to fulfill her whims and not the other way around. Stop being so expendable all the time and throw a tantrum every once in a while and see how she reacts. Never be the guy who submits to her every whim or else you’ll end getting hurt or worse. A guy who can’t take charge when needed almost always ends up losing all the confidence in his life and in the end will be left emasculated. When you feel like you’re being used then try turning the table back on her to see how she reacts. And if it turns out she’s willing to help you when you need then she is into you as well. But for some reason, she doesn’t then you have your answer.

One way Conversations

Have you ever thought that your girlfriend talks too much but is never ready to listen to what you have to say? Sure every girl likes to talk and gossip but a girl who is in love with you or is even slightly interested in you is definitely going to be interested in what you have to say. Some girls only want guys to console her when she talks about how chaotic her life is. The girl who needs this much consoling should go for confession in a church rather than talking to a guy and stringing him along. This is common sense if you think about it because you are willing to hear her talk for hours as you’re interested in her and if she is too then why is she not returning the favor. If you want to test her then try talking about some personal problem with her and check out how she responds and you’ll know the truth.

She’s Involved

Most relationship in which one or both parties involved are using each other is because of their own complicated love life. It’s not like an ordinary relationship in fact when the two of them one or both were in a relationship with someone else or still are. So, when they can cheat on their then partners then what’s stopping them from doing the same to you? A girl with complicated love life really doesn’t know what she is doing with you in the first place, using you is an entirely different matter.

Maybe she is with you because you make her feel good about her and if that is the case then why doesn’t she leave the other guy and commit to you. If a girl is not committing to anyone guy then she is using all of them for one reason or the other. For some girls, they don’t do this intentionally but it just happens to turn out this way but there are others who just do it because it makes their life easy. I mean who wouldn’t like a glorified worker for themselves who would work hard to fulfill your every desire. So, just look out for who you are getting involved with.

When you really think that a girl is using you then there are two things you can do. The first is to talk about how you feel with her and make it clear that there need to be some changes and if it doesn’t work then walk away. The second thing is a bit diabolical but if you can handle it then here it is. Just remove the love out of the equation and start playing the game but this time it is on your terms. No matter which way you choose just remember the goal is not to get hurt and not hurt her.

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