How To Not Be Nervous On First Date

September 11, 2021

Find the best way to not be nervous on a first date with a guy or girl. These dating tips will help you calm down and get over anxiety before you meet your crush.

not be nervous on first date

The subject of the first dates is complicated for both men and women. Upon this meeting depends the future of the relationship as it could confirm the compatibility of those involved.

Nervousness is a feeling which is a physical and psychological reaction programmed genetically to deal with dangerous situations. This danger can be real or not. According to a study published in the journal Psychological Medicine by the University of Queensland, Australia, one in 14 people suffer from nervousness on first dates, and women and young people suffer the most.

Talking non-stop or not opening your mouth, laughing loudly, or releasing a series of nonsense jokes can ruin your date. If the anxiety takes control of the situation, sweating, dizziness, flushing, stuttering, or stomach upset will be seen. If this happens, a first date can turn out to be a disaster. Follow these simple tricks to overcome anxiety and not be nervous on a first date with a guy or girl. Then, you can put some techniques in place to prevent stress from ruining the first date.

Always stay positive

Anyone who has experienced anxiety at other times may be worried about what may go wrong on a first date—saying something inappropriate or having behavior that embarrasses them can trigger a chain of negative thoughts. As a consequence of these negative thoughts, stress and nervousness take over us.

If you want not to feel nervous, there is a tool that in principle seems obvious, but sometimes it is not easy to get: stop focusing on what can go wrong. Limiting oneself to living the present moment without judging acts is a meditation technique. This technique helps control and limit negative thoughts. Investigations conducted by the Department of Psychiatry of Massachusetts General Hospital and Rush University of Chicago conclude.

But even if it seems simple, it is easier said than done when we encounter evil thoughts. Therefore, the study resorts to meditation mindfulness which teaches to let thoughts pass without being judged. Participants who practiced this meditation based on stress reduction were less likely to feel nervous about their actions and treated more compassion.

Nobody is perfect

But what causes nervousness on a first date? In many cases, it is a fact of thinking that the other person is perfect and full of mistakes. When trying to hide them comes the disaster.

These people pretend to act perfectly, without admitting their failures and limitations with naturalness. In addition, they believe that the others are perfect, which brings anxiety.

This distortion of reality triggers an inferiority complex that can materialize in inactivity. For example, the most common symptoms when someone is nervous on a date are not active in a conversation, overthinking not to screw up, increased heart rate, sweating, mumbling, and shivering.

The psychological trick to not being nervous on a first date is making yourself think you are a celebrity. I know you are not, but act like one and treat the guy/girl with respect. It is essential to face the fears to overcome them. Even if we fail in that first meeting, it is always positive to live the situation because we gain experience.

According to the Psychiatric Times, exposure-based therapy should be considered the first line of treatment for anxiety disorders. Therefore, it is necessary to start with situations that you fear moderately and gradually increase towards those that most affect you.

Burn the nerves

Meditation is one of the most valuable tools to dissolve anxiety, but it is not the only technique. Transpiring the nerves is an excellent way to get more relaxed on your date. Another formula to keep the situation under control is to exercise before the date. Raise the levels of endorphins, which decrease the level of pain and increase the sense of well-being. In addition, it reduces those hormones responsible for stress, advises the School of Harvard Medical School.

It can be good to practice relaxation before the meeting or do physical exercise to discharge so much energy accumulated. In severe cases, it is advisable to ask a psychologist for help, adds an expert. You can also get help from a dating guru. Put into practice these simple tips provided by experts. Then, the next time you face a first date, you will be much more relaxed and at ease.

Tip to not be nervous on first date

We can feel completely comfortable in the presence of someone of the other sex and have no problem going out and enjoying new experiences. Despite this, it is almost impossible to avoid the nerves, anxiety, and fears about the possibility of not having a good conversation will invade us the first time we date someone. And if you're a bit shy, the stage becomes more confusing. In a way, we know, so we give you some valuable tips, so you know how to get rid of the nervousness of the first date.

If you are a girl read our guide on first date tips for women. For guys read our tips on first date tips for men.

  1. A good way to relax is not to add too much pressure to the matter. If you have a lot of time without going out with someone it is normal to feel excited about a date. Do not make too much expectations and this will reduce your nerves. With less expectations, you will not feel sad about a possible failure.
  2. Enjoy the date and just do not think beyond. Think of it as an opportunity to get out of the routine meet with someone new. If the date goes well, you go to a second great meeting, else not. At least you will have lost nothing. Think of it as you are gaining experience and enjoy.
  3. Dress in a way that makes you feel comfortable. The garment that makes you feel good, handsome and comfortable is very important to feel good. If you really want to not feel nervous on a first date then better look good. Studies have shown that wearing good clothes makes you feel confident from inside.
  4. Choose the place of the date in an environment in which you feel safe and comfortable.
  5. Please be natural, show who you are and do not pretend to be someone else. The more natural you stay, the more confident it will make you feel. The more you pretend, the more nervous you feel. The first date is not a contest to impress the other, it is an opportunity to meet a person. This guy or girl who may or may not be in your future, so it is best to show yourself as you are without masks.
  6. Do not try to show all your virtues in one night. Don't brag that I'm professional, patient, cheerful, adventurous ... it's that I'm not jealous, I'm sure of myself, I'm not dependent ... bla bla bla. In order to overcome nervousness on a date, guys usually try to praise themselves too much. Give the opportunity to the other that you can infer the good qualities you show in that opportunity. Relax is not a sale of yourself, it is just a date.
  7. Fewer questions and more casual conversation is a good way to imagine a date. One of the situations that can make your date uncomfortable is the feeling of talking to a detective. Do not fall into that and surely the other will not either.
  8. If you are nervous, you make the other feel nervous like you. For all the first dates can be somewhat uncomfortable, so be calm and do your utmost to make the evening pleasant.
  9. Never try to fight the nerves of the first date by drowning in alcohol, the results can be disastrous and there may not be a second date, so drink in moderation.
  10. Lastly, believe in one dating principle that the more you go on dates, the more experience you gain.

Remember that meeting anyone at the beginning can be embarrassing. There could be some awkward silences, some things that may not flow perfectly, but the reality is that if both connect, they will be very well together. So, talk usually and live the experience. Read our guide on blind date advice and tips if you happen to be going on a blind date sometime soon.

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